


Cuspid

by singing_to_shipwreck (shocked_into_shame)



Category: What We Do in the Shadows (TV)
Genre: Blood, First Kiss, Kissing, M/M, Making Out, Tumblr Prompt, gratuitous twilight references
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-09
Updated: 2020-05-09
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:21:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,085
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24087295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shocked_into_shame/pseuds/singing_to_shipwreck
Summary: In response to the tumblr prompt: "this randomly popped into my head... 'Kissing Nandor certainly had its risks. Guillermo could cut his tongue on a fang to start.'"In which Nandor and Guillermo experiment with kissing, and goddammit it's not like Twilight (except it kind of totally is).
Relationships: Guillermo/Nandor the Relentless (What We Do in the Shadows TV)
Comments: 30
Kudos: 274





	Cuspid

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not sure if this is what the anon had in mind, but here we are. I tried to get a little steamier between them, and I played around with PAST TENSE, which I almost never write in. So forgive me if there is any incorrect tense usage in here. 
> 
> Spoilers for Twilight, I guess. 
> 
> Please enjoy!

Kissing Nandor wasn’t without its risks. This was, of course, because of the whole _fangs_ deal. 

Guillermo had spent a lot of time imagining kissing his master, and hadn’t exactly factored the fangs into the equation. 

The first time they kissed, a gentle brushing of lips that took Guillermo by surprise, it wasn’t an issue. 

Guillermo had been angry - very, very angry. It’s hard, looking back, to remember what exactly it was that he had been so angry about or what set him off. 

But it was like a dam had burst, and one moment he was cool and collected, keeping his calm facade in place. Then, in the next he was screaming at Nandor like a madman, his tirade mainly centered around the fact that Nandor didn’t give a shit about him, even after all of this time. 

Years of pent up frustration and rage had bubbled to the surface, and Nandor had surprisingly taken it in stride, waiting for Guillermo to trail off before asking placidly, “Are you finished?” 

Guillermo had opened his mouth to retort: no, I am _not_ finished. But Nandor cut him off, bringing him close and leaning down to join their lips in a kiss. It was a blink-and-you’ll miss it sort of kiss, the kind that was done as soon as it started. Just a gentle brush of Nandor’s cool lips against his own, and then his master was pulling away, looking at the floor almost shyly. 

“You kissed me,” Guillermo had said, plainly. _Dumbly_ , his mind supplied. 

Nandor simply nodded, before adding, “I did not appreciate that tone you took with me, Guillermo.”

That had been the first time. No worries there. 

The second time (which Guillermo hadn’t been exactly anticipating either), is when the problem became quite literally painfully apparent. 

It was the day after their first kiss, and Guillermo had noticed a bit of awkwardness between them as he awoke Nandor and got him ready for the night. They mostly didn’t speak to each other, more uncomfortably hovering around each other as they went about their business. 

Shortly after the camera crew arrived, Nandor and Laszlo had gotten into a bit of a spat, which ended with them flying and chasing each other around the house and eventually into the library, where they knocked over an entire shelf of newly reorganized books, much to Guillermo’s dismay.

Guillermo had quickly handled the argument and ushered the crew out of the house to let his master lick his wounds in private. 

The familiar was re-rearranging the bookshelf, humming quietly to himself to pass the time, when he suddenly felt strong, cool arms encircling his waist from behind. He stiffened before Nandor rested his chin on his shoulder gently, after which he relaxed into the embrace. “Hi, master,” he whispered shyly. 

“I really appreciate how you behaved tonight, Guillermo,” Nandor breathed, and Guillermo felt a shiver run down his spine at his master’s cool breath on his neck. “You stood beside me and took my side.” 

“That’s my job, master,” Guillermo responded, downplaying his own role in mediating and dismantling the argument. 

“Well, yes,” Nandor acquiesced. “But I know that you were not happy with me. So I appreciate you having my back despite that.”

“I’m not mad at you anymore, master,” Guillermo extracted himself from the embrace and turned around. “I said what I needed to say last night. And after you um…”

“Kissed you,” Nandor supplied. 

“Yes. After that, I felt better. I realized that you really do care about me.” Guillermo took a deep breath and looked up into his master’s dark eyes. “But…”

“But? What is the but?” Panic was apparent on Nandor’s face. 

“I wanted to know if it was a one time thing?” Guillermo furrowed his brows. He hadn’t meant to say that like a question. He took a deep breath and continued, “I mean I hoped it _wasn’t_ a one time thing. As in, I would like to do that again. With you.”

Nandor’s concern had faded and molded into thinly-veiled amusement. “You would like for me to kiss you again?” 

“Yes, please.”

Nandor leaned down and gave Guillermo yet another delicate kiss before pulling away so quickly that Guillermo didn’t even get a chance to respond. He huffed in frustration. 

Nandor looked affronted. “Did you not enjoy that kiss?”

“No!” Guillermo assured, resting his hand on Nandor’s chest. “I enjoyed it, master. It’s just that… you pulled away so quickly I didn’t really get to kiss you back.”

“Oh,” Nandor responded, like that hadn’t occurred to him before. “Honestly, I don’t know how much further I can go with the kissy kissy, Guillermo.”

Guillermo couldn’t help but frown, letting his disappointment clear on his face. Figures, he thought to himself. Nandor had always had a bit of trouble expressing his feelings. It was never easy for him to show that he cared. 

And why should this be any different? Maybe chaste kisses were as good as it was going to get. Guillermo felt guilty for wanting more than that, but so help him, he did. 

“You look so glum, Guillermo,” Nandor observed. It reminded Guillermo of their 10th anniversary, but he felt satisfied to know that Nandor of a year ago wouldn’t have done what Nandor of the present was doing, stepping closer and cupping Guillermo’s cheek in his palm. 

“I guess I just thought since _you_ kissed _me_ , that you wouldn’t mind taking it further. But that’s okay if you don’t want to. I understand.” 

Nandor shook his head, baring his teeth. “You misunderstand me, Guillermo. I would like to kiss you more passionately, but I am afraid for you.”

“That you’ll lose control and hurt me?”

Nandor scoffs. “No, this isn’t _Twilight_ , Guillermo. I won’t break the headboard while I’m fucking you.”

Guillermo felt his cheeks flush and his stomach tightened slightly. He hadn’t even let himself picture having sex with Nandor, but now that his master had mentioned it he was having trouble picturing much of anything else. He floundered for a response before settling on, “Wow, you really know your _Twilight_ , master.”

“Well, that’s really a reference to _Breaking Dawn Part 1,_ but, yes, I do.” Nandor looked entirely too proud of this fact, and Guillermo had to bite back a smile. “Anyway, as I was saying before you distracted me with talking about _Twilight_ -”

“You’re the one who brought up _Twilight_.” 

Nandor pursed his lips, obviously wanting to fight Guillermo on this, but Guillermo watched in awe as he stopped himself from continuing the back and forth. “I’m not afraid of my losing control with you,” Nandor explained slowly. “But, these teeth!” He curled up one of the corners of his upper lip, revealing his long, pointed canine. “I could hurt you without even meaning to!” 

Guillermo tilted his head to the side, considering this. “We’ll be careful,” he eventually settled on, his hand sneaking up to begin playing with Nandor’s hair. He delighted in the small shiver of pleasure Nandor gave at having his scalp touched by Guillermo’s fingertips. 

“I don’t know, Guillermo,” Nandor responded, voice lilting melodically. 

"We will. Remember in _Breaking Dawn Part 1_? Edward and Bella had trouble at first, but then with a little practice, everything was okay.” 

Nandor took a moment to consider this, his dark eyes fixed on Guillermo’s face. Guillermo felt naked under his gaze. “You are right, Guillermo,” Nandor admitted before grabbing Guillermo’s shoulder and leaning down for another kiss. 

This time, he didn’t pull away, and Guillermo was able to kiss back, their lips brushing each other’s over and over until Guillermo’s cheeks were flushed and his breathing was labored. 

Guillermo was then the one to pull away, delighting in seeing Nandor’s eyes closed, dreamily leaning forward for another kiss. “Hold on,” he murmured, gently touching Nandor’s face. “Let me take off my glasses.” 

Once the offending frames were off and placed on the shelf behind them, all Guillermo could see in focus was his master’s face, and everything else was quite literally a blur. The effect was oddly romantic, and Guillermo found himself emboldened by it, tugging his master down insistently for another kiss, surprising even himself with the ferocity of it.

As he pressed his lips against Nandor’s, both hands now tangled in his master’s soft, dark hair, he whimpered slightly. Nandor’s response to that tiny sound delighted and surprised him, as he found himself being shoved into the shelf behind him, the vampire’s body pressed tightly against his. Nandor’s body was a solid, cool column against his, and he felt trapped in the greatest way possible. 

He gave Nandor’s long hair the slightest tug, and the growl that the vampire gave in response resonated loudly in his throat. 

The amount of experience that Guillermo had with kissing was very small, but he couldn’t recall another time that kissing without any tongue had affected him so much. He felt hot all over, soothed by the coolness of Nandor’s fingers against his cheeks. He felt distantly embarrassed about all of the noises he was making, an almost steady stream of whimpers and whines escaping him, but Nandor didn’t seem to mind. 

God, if this is how it was with just closed mouth kissing, would Guillermo survive using tongue? Would he just combust? There was really only one way to find out. He steeled his nerves, breathing in, and shyly brushed his tongue against Nandor’s lower lip, scratching at the nape of Nandor’s neck at the same time. 

Nandor growled _again_ and pressed his knee between Guillermo’s legs as he parted his lips to allow Guillermo access to his mouth. Guillermo could have cried it felt so amazing, unlike anything he had ever felt before, as he felt the coolness of his master’s tongue against his, his head swimming with the feeling of it and with the sound of Nandor’s groans. He breathed harshly through his nose, taking in the unique, almost damp smell that clung to Nandor’s clothes.

Guillermo was on cloud nine. Things could not be any more perfect, he thought. 

And then suddenly his tongue was on fire as Nandor’s fang sliced it, and he yelped in surprise. It didn’t hurt, not really, but the shock of it made tears prick at his eyes. 

Nandor pulled away instantly, horrified, his hands coming up to cover his mouth, and Guillermo could taste the blood pooling in his own mouth. 

“Oh,” he gasped, looking at his master and noticing with amusement that Nandor’s hair was a mess, totally mussed by Guillermo’s own hands. If he weren’t so preoccupied with the deer in the headlights look on his master’s face, he might have laughed and pointed it out. 

“I hurt you,” Nandor observed, sadly, taking another step away from Guillermo. “I knew this would happen, Guillermo! I said it might happen and what do you know? It happened!”

“It’s not a big deal,” Guillermo soothed, fixing his glasses back on his face and tugging the hem of his sweater down to hide the still very much tented front of his trousers. “The bleeding already stopped,” he lied, swallowing down the continued flow of blood. 

“Not a big deal?” Nandor echoed, manically. “Your blood was in my mouth, Guillermo! And it tasted so _virginal._ That was a real temptation for me, Guillermo.” 

Guillermo couldn’t help himself as he fiddled with his glasses before shyly retorting, “If we had kept going, it wouldn’t have tasted very virginal for much longer.”

“I could have eaten you and you are thinking about sex?” 

“Well, yeah,” Guillermo responded, chuckling slightly. “That’s what we were leading up to, right?”

“Well not anymore!” Nandor practically screeched, taking yet another step back. “Not if it means I could eat you, Guillermo!” With that, he left in a rush, and Guillermo leaned back against the shelf, watching him go. 

He sighed to himself and bent down to finish putting the books back in place, when he settled upon one volume in particular. The chess pieces on the front of _Breaking Dawn_ stared back at him and he grimaced. “This is not like _Twilight_ ,” he clarified, looking up to the camera that wasn’t there on instinct. He frowned at himself. 

Fuck it, he thought, settling into a chair. He reached into his pocket for his handkerchief, pressing it tightly against his tongue to stop the flow of blood before cracking open _Breaking Dawn_. “Okay, Bella,” he murmured, flipping through the pages. “Teach me your ways.” 


End file.
